Solitude Only Goes So Far

Written by Will, The Galactic Free Press.

I can understand the appeal of being alone, especially for the more spiritually oriented in our society. For years I didn’t have anybody I could really talk to about what I was going through, so much of my time was spent walking through nature by myself. However, being alone so much never really felt “right”, I always yearned for other people to interact with. I did have friends, but it was clear our paths were going in different directions, and being with them very much felt emotionally draining.

Before long I moved to the big city believing I could connect with more people there. Boy was I naive! There’s a term, “urban solitude”, which describes perfectly my experience in the city. You might think that more people together means more connection between them, but in the big city the opposite seems to be true.

I watched as people went out of their way to avoid personal contact with each other. It was fascinating to see people make an effort to not even look at each other. You could wave and say “hi”, but many people would react by looking down at the ground. All the people so busy trying to get someplace else that they’re barely aware of where they are.

After a few years in the big city I moved to a very small town with a more spiritually oriented community. This was a breath of fresh air compared to the city. I connected with more people in a week there than I did the years I lived in the city. Sure, the smaller communities have their drama and gossip, but the personal connection between people is there and it’s something very sacred.

Humans are social beings, and to really be Whole, you need personal relationships in your life. Not only that, but if we really want to start creating a New Earth, social interactions are essential. Changes aren’t going to come from a whole bunch of isolated spiritual people trying to do things their own way. The changes we need the most are only going to come through people working together. The world we have at the moment is one that’s been created largely through isolation and separation. Those things are some of the biggest issues we face, and more isolation is not going to help anybody.

What we need the most now is for people to come together out of Love, Joy and Equality. There’s such an amazing opportunity for individual and collective growth through that. So long as people rely upon things like fear to connect them, such as the case with nationalism and war, society will remain ignorant. There’s even spiritual teachers who promote isolation and separation, as if this is a way to find real peace in your life. Social development is very much part of the path back to Oneness, and sitting on the mountain top meditating all day can really halt your growth. If you’re only at peace when you’re alone, how peaceful are you really? It’s easy to be at peace when there’s nothing there to disturb you, anybody can do that, the challenge we face now is finding peace with each other.

People who rely upon solitude are really missing what Co-Creation means. It’s such an incredibly powerful catalyst for change when two or more people get together and work towards a shared vision. This is a very rare thing at the moment, it’s far more common that people rally behind some leader’s vision, a vision that most of the people who spread it don’t really have any direct influence upon. This happens frequently in spiritual communities, and it’s really separation masquerading as unity. The ones who control the vision may even say everyone is equal, but the way it really works is that some are “more equal” than others.

I’d also like to talk about the limits of online interactions. While the internet is a very useful tool for interacting with others, it’s also inherently limited in that respect. It’s not a real substitute for live interaction with another human being. The tone of another’s voice, their body language, their facial expression, so much of the subtleties and warmth that comes from personal interaction is lost when communicating over the computer. Not that I believe connecting with others over the internet is a bad thing, but it’s not a replacement for real live personal connections.

For the lonely, I offer this advice: Seek and ye shall find. When you’re by yourself, you can view it as an opportunity to learn to be happy with yourself. It’s a very useful thing for your social development too, as emotionally needy people are not much fun to be around. It’s really only when your confident and happy with who you are that you can have a truly healthy relationship with another.


The Galactic Free Press
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One comment

  1. What I see happening is we are all feeling more connected to each other and interacting is becoming much easier, but we still have some rough spots to go through. One of these waves of LOVE is bound to really put people in a more socializing mood, so it will happen in its own time. One should certainly strive to be that way even if they don’t really “feel” it, but most people need to be alone to process and go within at this time. I have walked through a store in my town and just beamed love and talked to people and acted in an upbeat mood, and it really moves people to interact with you and feel better about their day, but I don’t always feel like doing that 24-7. Not yet, anyway.


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