Have you ever noticed that people will argue over just about anything? No matter what your point or your position, there always seems to be an argument for the opposing side.
The positive side of all of this arguing? Well, it means we always have choices and we get to decide how we perceive the world.
The downside of all of this arguing? Well, I suppose there are several negative things that come from arguing, but the one I’m going to focus on today is that when you argue, you are often arguing for your limitations.
What is arguing for your limitations?
Arguing for your limitations means that you believe that you can’t do, be or have something you want because of some sort of excuse.
For example, perhaps a friend of yours asks for some advice on a problem she is having. You think about her problem, and come up with an idea you think might help her out.
However, when you tell her your great idea, she starts out with a “Yeah, but…” and then follows her statement with a list of reasons why your advice won’t work.
This is one of many ways that we often argue for our limitations.
What’s wrong with arguing for your limitations?
Well, with the Law of Attraction, we get back from the universe what we put out there. If we are putting out there our belief that we are incapable of doing, being or having something in life because of a limitation, that will be our experience.
The truth is that we’ll never be wealthy if we are always complaining about our problems with money. We’ll never find love if we believe we are unlovable. We’ll never repair a relationship by focusing on what the other person did wrong.
I know you know that this is true.
Think about the people who have most inspired you in life. They are often people who have overcome great obstacles and limitations, and often they are obstacles and limitations that are much greater than any of the ones you or I are facing right now.
They’ve reached greatness by refusing to believe that their limitations could limit them. This was how they harnessed their power to get where they wanted to be.
Below are a dozen common ways we argue for our limitations. Are you holding on to any of these today?
14 Common Excuses:
- I don’t have enough money/I’m in debt.
- Things are outside of my control.
- I don’t have enough experience.
- I’ve got ___________ (some sort of medical or psychological condition).
- Our government is run by idiots.
- __________ is out to get me (my boss, my friend, my neighbor, etc).
- I had a rough childhood.
- The economy’s bad.
- I’m too young/old for that.
- I don’t have the right connections.
- My ___________ is unsupportive (family, friends, partner, kids, etc).
- I was a victim of _____________ (abuse, neglect, disease, natural disaster, etc.).
- I’ve had a hard life.
- I have the worst luck.
Now here’s the thing, if any of the above statements “sting” a little, you’ve just identified a way that you argue for your limitations. If it feels a bit painful, it means it’s a statement of limitation that you’ve come to identify with in some way.
While this can be an uncomfortable discovery, take heart. Once we understand how we argue for our limitations, we can start to put these arguments behind us. My goal here isn’t to hurt your feelings, rather it’s to help you move past these limitations, so you can move forward and create a life you prefer.
Truth be told, every single one of those excuses on that list has plagued me at one time or another in my life, so I can sympathize with the pain of feeling victimized by life and I realize that for some people, this article may be offensive. So if you feel upset by this article, please trust that I come from a place understanding and love, rather than judgement and ridicule.
I know my life took off when I began dropping the excuses, so if you’re holding on to any, I want you to understand that you can let them go and it will be OK. A better life is closer than you think when you stop arguing for your limitations.
How do we put these arguments behind us?
The first step is simply to stop talking about them. The next time you feel compelled to tell someone why you can’t do, be or have what you want, simply keep the thought to yourself.
The second step is to start to look for reasons why you CAN do, be or have what you want. Look for any evidence at all that it’s possible. Then, start talking about the possibilities!
Maybe you’re broke right now, but you’re smart and you have great ideas. Focus on the possibility that your intelligence and good ideas could lead you to a new job, or an invention or a breakthrough with money of some kind.
Maybe you’re broken-hearted right now, but you’ve loved before and you know you’re a great girlfriend or boyfriend. Remind yourself that you are capable of loving and being loved.
Maybe you don’t like your boss, but you have great coworkers and you know you’re awesome at your job. Let people know how much you like your coworkers and all the good things that you’ve done for the company.
Over time, you will program your mind to start thinking in a more positively expectant way. It isn’t difficult to stop arguing for your limitations, and it doesn’t require a bunch of effort. It just requires a willingness to give it a shot, and keep up with it.
The truth is, we all have limitations if we want to look for them. We all can find a bunch of reasons not to do, be or have something that we want.
However, those who are doing big things chose not to reflect on the limitations, but instead they look for reasons why they can be successful and dwell on those instead.
If something is important for you to do, be or have, become more mindful of arguing for your limitations. Just because something is “true” doesn’t mean that you have to give it your attention and allow it to snowball into a bigger problem in your life.
Make a choice today to argue for your possibilities, and let the excuses go because they aren’t helping you at all in any way, shape or form. Give yourself a chance to do, be or have that thing that you really want.
I am very interested to see how this article will be received. Does this piece inspire you to focus on your ability to go after the things you want, or do you feel compelled to argue against the point? Comment below and share your thoughts!
Thanks for Reading! XO, Andrea
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About the author:
Andrea Schulman is a former high school psychology teacher and the creator of Raise Your Vibration Today, which provides free and easy Law of Attraction techniques. She will be available for group educational seminars and webinars starting in the summer of 2015.