Written by Marquita Herald, Emotionally Resilient Living, August 4, 2014 | Thanks to Awakening Daily.

Nurturing solitude provides an opportunity to regain perspective and renews you for the challenges of life …

Be honest … where do YOU regularly reside on your list of priorities? Do you make a point of setting aside time for rest, reflection and self nurturing?

Maybe like so many others you have good intentions to do right by yourself, but never quite seem to make it to “me time” on your overflowing task list.

There’s no question that when you’re already challenged to balance work, family and a multitude of obligations, setting aside periods of time just for yourself is not only a challenge, but it can feel downright selfish.

The problem is you simply cannot be at your healthy, happy best if you don’t regularly take time out to rest, relax and renew, and one of the most effective disciplines you can cultivate is setting aside quality periods of solitude.

The Difference Between Solitude and Loneliness

Solitude is the ability to enjoy inward quietness … the state of being alone without being lonely. It is a positive and constructive state of engagement with oneself.

The primary difference between loneliness and solitude is attitude.

Being solitary is being alone well: being alone luxuriously immersed in doings of your own choice, aware of the fullness of your won presence rather than of the absence of others. Because meaningful solitude is an achievement. ~Alice Koller

While we may differ temperamentally as far as the amount of alone time we need, everyone can benefit from at least some periods of solitude. Unfortunately there are those for whom there is no prospect more disturbing than that of having to spend time alone. In fact for some people the need to fill up space with noise and chatter is pervasive, whether it’s time spent with other people, listening to music or just having the television on to avoid silence and stave off feelings of loneliness.

While our extroverted society encourages indulging these feelings, please consider that there is a significant difference between simply enjoying an active lifestyle and the company of others and perpetually surrounding oneself with noise and activity to avoid having to focus on the state of one’s own life.

The Benefits of Alone Time

Intentional times of solitude can be enriching and refreshing and allow you to do the internal work needed to recenter and experience new perspectives that help you understand more fully the things that really matter to you.

It can be a little daunting at first, but the result of this awareness is that you learn what drives you, what excites you, and what motivates you. This new-found self-awareness is a beautiful thing and it can have a dramatically positive effect on your life and relationships.

The quieter you become, the more you can hear. ~Ram Dass

Keep in mind there is no one-size-fits-all method to organizing your periods of self nurturing solitude. It’s whatever works for you. Maybe you’re favorite “me time” place will be curled up with a good book in an overstuffed chair in your den, treating yourself to a relaxing bubble bath, setting aside time for meditation, taking a long walk or digging your toes in the sand at the sea shore.

Solitude provides you with the opportunity to regain perspective. It renews you for the challenges of life transitions at times when you may need extra strength to find joy. It allows you to feel you are in the position of driving your own life, rather than having it run by schedules and external demands.

Self-nurturing does not have to be difficult or overly time-consuming, in fact an important aspect of self-nurturing is to value your time and reduce commitments and obligations that do little more than drain your energy.

Your turn. What do you do to nurture yourself and renew your energy?

Embrace your inner strength; it is your outer foundation …

My name is Marquita and I’m an author, resilience coach, publisher, world traveler, Maui girl, Introvert and lover of wine, road trips, peanut butter cookies and a dog named Lucy.

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